Change Your Relationship With The NOW

The Zen master Hakuin lived in a town in Japan. He was held in high regard and many people came to him for spiritual teaching. Then it happened that the teenage daughter of his next door neighbor became pregnant. When being questioned by her angry and scolding parents as the identity of the father, she finally told them that he was Hakuin, the Zen Master. In great anger the parents rushed over to Hakuin and told him with much shouting accusation that the daughter bad confessed that he was the father. All he was replied was “is that so?”

News of the scandal spread throughout the town and beyond. The master lost his reputation. This did not trouble him. No one came to see him anymore. He remained unmoved. When the child was born, the parents brought him to Hakuin. “You are the father so you look after him.” The Master took loving care of the child. A year later, the mother remorsefully confessed to her parents that the real father of the child was the young man who worked at the butcher shop. In great distress they went and apologized to Hakuin and asked for forgiveness. “We are really sorry. We have come to take the baby back. Our daughter confessed that you are not the father.”  “Is that so>” is all he would say as he handed the baby over to them.

The Master responds to falsehood and truth, bad news and good news, in exactly the same way. “Is that so?” He allows the form of the moment, good or bad, to be as it is and so he does not become a participant in human drama. TO him there is only this moment, and the moment is as it is. He is nobody’s victim. He is so completely at one with what happens that what happens has no power over him anymore. Only if you resist what happens are you at the mercy of what happens, and the world will determine your happiness and unhappiness.

Imagine briefly how the ego would have reacted during the various stages of the unfolding of these events.

Ego and the Present Moment

The most important, the primordial relationship in your life is your relationship with the Now, or rather with whatever form the now takes, that is to say, what is or what happens. If your relationship with the Now is dysfunctional, that dysfunction will be reflected in every relationship and every situation you encounter. The ego could be defined simply in this way: a dysfunctional relationship with the present moment. It is at this moment that you can decided what relationship you want to have with the present moment.

Once you have reached a certain level of consciousness, (and by reading this you almost certainly have), you are able to decide what kind of relationship you want to have with the present moment. Do I want the present moment to be my friend or enemy. The present moment is inseparable from life, so you are really deciding on what kind of relationship you want with life. Once you have decided you want the moment to be your friend, it is up to you to make the first move. Become friendly toward it, welcome it no matter what disguise it comes, and soon it will become friendly toward you, people become helpful, circumstances become cooperative. One decision changes your entire reality. This decision has to be made again and again and again- until it becomes natural to live in such a way.

The decision to become friends with the present is the end of the ego. The ego can never be in alignment with the present moment, which is to say, aligned with life, since it is its very nature to ignore, resist, and devalue the Now. The stronger the ego, the more time it takes to over your life. Almost every thought you think is concerned with past of future, and your sense of self depends on the future for its fulfillment. Fear, anxiety, expectation, regret, guilt, and anger are the dysfunctions to the time bound state of consciousness.  

Via A NEW EARTH- By Eckhart Tolle

Solitude within the Multitude

     What do you see when you look at this painting? Most would say they see a man and a woman sitting together in a room- but if you take a closer look, you will see what Edward Hopper was conveying in this scene. Hopper is one of my new favorite American Artists. I am haunted by the message he is conveying here in this piece- along with many of his other works. Here Hopper is conveying the concept of which I think we all can connect to “the Solitude within the multitude.” In this scene there is a disconnect between the man and the woman. The man is reading his paper and the woman is keying piano chords. They are in the same room, yet turned away from one another, absorbed in their own thoughts and their own worlds. This is a great example of how we all have massively valuable people around us, we are never truly alone, yet we all often feel alone- the solitude within the multitude. We often feel a disconnection toward other people and isolate ourselves from a potentially great life. This is often a silent, unconscious choice that we have a habit of making- at least that is the way it seems to go for me.



     For me this painting is a great reminder that we do not have to be a solitude within the multitude (although some alone time can be the most fabulous thing on the planet, but that is not what I am talking about here), there are a lot of great people and wonderful things around us if we just allow ourselves to open our eyes to it. When I see Hoppers work, it makes me want to connect to people again. There is a massive disconnection in the world, and I think it’s time we all make an attempt to reconnect once again- to family, friends, and strangers on the street. Just a simple smile can make a huge difference in someone’s day. Any act of kindness is never wasted.


On this subject, the following quote comes to mind:


“For every man is a golden link in the chain of my good.” -Scovell Schinn


     It conveys that we are all connected, no matter who we are or how removed we are from each other. We are all living breathing creatures who all deserve loving kindness- the neighbor across the street, the jack wagon that cut you off in traffic, even the bully who made your life a living hell in high school.


     I suggest you give it a whirl. Connect with humanity once again and be present in the moment where ever you are- and smile. We all have a lot to be thankful for.